Thursday, May 22, 2008

I've got like ZERO posting time but...

I got the call.

the dreaded call.

Quick story - the potential employer calls me and says I have good news and bad news.

Immediately I think "F*ck". That's not good.

He tells me exactly what I've been hearing rumors about - that they went internal. There were 2 positions and the initial rumor was one could be internal and the other external. In the end he told me it came down to a numbers game, and they offered positions to the internals, and had there been a 3rd position I would have been hired too.
He gave me a LOT of positive feedback from the folks who I had my interview with and also said (here comes the good news) that in the 2nd quarter they may be having 4 new positions opened, and he'd email me so that I could skip the preliminaries of the normal interview.
So essentially if it comes again, I just go right to the in-person interview.

That *is* good news and I *do* appreciate it, but I can't help feel shafted. From what I gathered, there was not ONE thing I could have done better, it was just company mandates & politics that got the other 2 hired.

So anyway, that's the deal.

Pretty sad.
Dave is pretty much a shoe-in for his position and they called him, and although they haven't made him an offer, they told him he may be going to a higher position than what he applied for.

Good for him, but just given the timing, It's hard to be supportive and happy.
Very hard.

And I feel terrible about it.

So now the waiting game for me begins again.

I want to get May over with so that the 2nd quarter can start. My only hope is that maybe I'll get a birthday present today or tomorrow where they call me and say that 1 person who was offered the job declined it. Hahaha... wishful thinking.. that and hoping I win the 27million on tomorrow's super 7 lottery.
Fat Chance. I think my birthday (tomorrow May 23) is going to be filled with mixed emotions and no big lotto! hahaha


Anyway, I really need to work on being supportive for Dave.

We have NOT been doing well at all.

I realized, when I try to talk to him, there is ZERO emotional connection with him. He cannot and does not reassure me or give me emotionally uplifting comments.
When I talk to him, he just says 'Yeah' now, like he agrees with what I'm saying just doesn't offer anything else. I realize now that I walk away from our conversations even more angry which doesn't help things.

I tried telling him last night, and he says he'll work on it. He says his problem is that he is a fixer and will look for solutions, but he's missing the emotional support I need.


Anyway, Thanks to everyone for all the kind words.

Eurydice it was SOO spooky the comment that you left about the 'squeaky wheel gets the oil' cuz I had literally just gotten off the phone with my mom who said that to me and then i read your comment and it said the same lol. Wowza!

to everyone else, you all rock as well! I appreciate the comments! It truely does help!


Jenn on May 22, 2008 at 1:00 p.m. said...

Aww sweetie.
I'm sorry that you got bad news.
Hopefully they open those new positions soon. I understand why you feel shafted - it sucks that there isn't anything you could have done better. Sometimes politics really suck!

I think its really important of you to be supportive of Dave. I totally get how it is hard though, but remember how much you love him and be happy for the good things that come his way. Good things will happen to you too!

I'm glad that you talked to him last night about your feelings and needs. Thats the only way to make things better. I hope that he does work on it more. Make sure he knows you appreciate it when he does.

On a good note, its almost the weekend! Try to find some time to relax a little bit! :)

Jen on May 22, 2008 at 1:57 p.m. said...

Bah, that REALLY sucks about the job!!! I would say screw the internal guys, isn't it all about "adding to the team" and getting in new blood??? I am hoping that someone calls and says "LEX we made a mistake, we NEED you!!" BUT that is also really great news that they would have other positions opening up!!

As for finding it hard to support Dave...that one is a toughie...I am trying to think from my point of view...if something great happened to me and Danny rained on my parade...I would feel pretty crappy about it...not saying you have to throw him a parade or anything...but maybe try to be a LITTLE happy for him??? It sucks on the timing though!!!

ON the other hand...he needs to be much more supportive of you...Danny isn't an emotional person, and I am dramatic...sometimes I need to remind him that he needs to say something or do something or react...and it's frustrating...I don't have any advice there!!!

I hope you win the lottery for you birthday! :)

Cat_82 on May 22, 2008 at 4:08 p.m. said...

Aww Lex...I'm so sorry you're having such a crappy time right now... I wish I could be there for you in person right now, 'cause I can totally see how badly you're feeling.

My heart is sad for you regarding Dave. Mike and I went through a similar thing a few months ago, and it's taken lots of hard work and commitment to make it better, but I can completly relate to how you're feeling about it now, and I know how down you must be. I think all you can do now is try to be there for him right now, and show him the love and support that you hope he would have shown you should the situation be reversed.

You WILL get through this sweetie, I promise! I'm here for you as much as I can be from across the country.

Lots of love

Erin on May 23, 2008 at 10:31 p.m. said...

Tag - you're it!!??

Maybe filling out some silly tag game will cheer you up? Or really irritate you....

Seriously, guys just don't get stuff. I am so sorry about the job news. Keep looking towards all the great things that are going to happen and keep looking for other things that are out there!

eurydice on May 27, 2008 at 6:08 p.m. said...

*woooooooooooo* that is my ghost sound haha.